Every relationship is different, and it will take different things to make it work. A healthy relationship is something that brings out the best in you and doesn’t dull your shine. People tend to try and over complicate relationships which can lead to heartbreak. Here are some important and simple tips to keeping a happy and healthy relationship with your partner:
Communication is key
Do not bottle up your emotions, they will eat away at you until one day you will just explode. Talk about your thoughts and feelings with your partner. If your upset or angry, take a breath, step back and talk. Help each other figure out the problem’s and work through them together. Talking through your problems instead of ignoring them helps to understand each other better and makes the relationship stronger.
After a while of being together, you will start to presume that your partner knows exactly what you want and need. This is not the case, people can not read minds. If you want something, ask! Don’t get stuck in a communication rut. If you live with your partner and you see each other every day you might fall into the habit of asking the same questions. Instead of asking “How was your day?”, why not ask “Did anything exciting happen today?”. Try to ask questions that will get better and more detailed responses, this will keep you communicating and help you feel more connected to each other.
Part of being in a healthy relationship is being able to understand each other’s needs. Coming up with clear boundaries is a good way to keep the relationship strong. Boundaries are not meant to make you feel trapped or restricted, it’s to make you feel secure and comfortable. For example, it is ok to want to have alone time or to go out with your friends. You don’t always need to be with each other.
A relationship shouldn’t restrict you if you have hobbies or activities you enjoyed doing alone before your relationship, then carry on doing them. Your partner should respect your life and want you to be happy. If you have a lock on your phone, your partner should understand that you don’t have to share it. If you want to then do by all means but just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean everything is suddenly fair game. You can spend time together and apart, independence is vital for a healthy relationship or you can form an unhealthy dependency on one and other.
Remember that it is healthy to have your own friends, your own time and your own hobbies outside of a relationship.
Make an effort
Relationships require time and effort to make them work, you need to put your all into them for it to be a success. It should be about the quality of the time spent together, not the quantity. You could come from work and sit on the sofa and watch TV together or you could sit down at the table and converse. Which do you think is more engaging? Engaging with one another is very important to gain that deep connection a healthy relationship needs. It’s ok to zone out and watch TV together sometimes, just don’t let it become an unhealthy habit.
When you’re in a loving relationship you can truly love each other for you who are inside and out. Your partner will love you and be attracted to you if you’re wearing your jogging bottoms or your best outfit. Just make sure to make the effort on special occasions, not just for your partner but for yourself. When you feel good, it shows, and your partner will notice.
To maintain a healthy relationship, you need to respect your partner. Respect can come in the form of beliefs, values, opinions, character and a person's time. Showing respect is very important, you can show respect by complimenting your partner on achievements, believing in their dreams and pushing them to achieve what they want out of life.
Respecting your partner will make sure you or your partner are not tempted to do anything that may damage the relationship. Relationships can be hard, and even though you love each other there will be times when your feelings are hurt, and you could be tempted to cheat. If you respect your partner and the relationship you shouldn’t even consider the option of cheating as you wouldn’t want to hurt the other person. Respect will give your relationship the opportunity to blossom into a stable, long-lasting relationship.
Honesty and trust
Being honest and truthful to your partner is crucial to a healthy and happy relationship. You need to be able to trust one another and believe that your partner will never do anything to hurt you. Be truthful when you speak and in your actions, honesty creates trust and that is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Lies can ruin the strongest of relationships, once you find yourself in a lie it is very hard to come back to a good place with your partner.
You have probably heard people say, “without trust, there is no love”, well this is true. Trust is the fundamental building blocks for love. At the end of the day, why would you want to be in a relationship without trust? Do you want to feel sad, scared, worried, constantly doubting the person you “love”? No, this is not what a healthy relationship looks like. You and your partner should be able to trust each other to go out separately or to play on your phone without any doubt of bad behavior. If you do have doubts, speak to your partner about them. Communication can solve most things.
You’ve probably heard the saying “if you don’t love yourself, how can you expect anyone else to love you”, well it’s true! To love yourself and be comfortable within your own skin means that you will a happier within yourself. When you are happy and comfortable other people including your partner will be able to see it, this will make them happier as well. A happy relationship is a healthy relationship.
Support each other
Showing that you support your partner is another way to show your love for them. No matter what it is, be it finishing a project at work, scoring a goal in football or just doing something they love. Show your support, tell them how proud you are of them and be there when they need you.
If your partner plays a sport that you don’t really like or understand you might feel like it doesn’t matter. Your partner will appreciate you being there, cheering them on and supporting them. Your support might be the difference between them failing or succeeding.
Spending quality time with your loved one is an important factor in any healthy relationship. Life can be busy and stressful at times and people tend to take out their stress on their partner. Now and again it’s important to forget about work, family, stresses and focus on each other. Take a day off together and do something fun, go to the cinema, visit the beach, go for a walk. Find something that you will both enjoy and do it together.
Take that much needed holiday, the more quality time you spend together as a couple the stronger your bond and connection will be. A holiday is the perfect reset button to forget all the arguments and focus on each other and having fun together while also making memories that will last a lifetime.
Being loyal means to have faith and devotion to your partner. Loyalty is the assurance of another person, the person you love. You must be able to feel like you can rely on your partner and that they have your back no matter what. Some ways that you can be loyal to your partner is to stick up for your partner when they need you too and you keep their secrets safe. If your relationship is healthy you shouldn’t feel the need to test each other’s loyalty.
Loyalty means never talking behind your partners back. Of cause if you're upset and need the support of a friend that is fine, but make sure you talk to your partner about the problems. Don’t choose to ignore them but then talk badly behind your partners back as it will not fix anything.
When you choose to be in a monogamous relationship, you should be loyal to your partner and only your partner. Discuss the rules of your relationship at the start and what crosses the lines of cheating as it will be different for everyone. Be loyal to your partner and always take their emotions into consideration before you act.
A vital part of a healthy relationship is being intimate with each other. Sexual contact and touching each other like hugging and kissing can make you closer physically and spiritually, it can give you a strong connection that you share with only each other. The quantity differs from each couple if one couple is intimate every night while another could be intimate twice a week, that's ok! Everyone is different and there isn’t a correct number of times you are intimate with your partner, its whatever feels right with you.
Sometimes after a couple has been together for a while, they can feel that their sex life has taken a setback. This is completely normal, but it doesn’t have it be that way. Reignite your sex life and keep the fire burning.
People can get so caught up in their everyday life that they can start to take things for granted, especially partners. Often, we think it, but we forget to say or show our appreciation for our partner.
There are many ways that you can show your partner that you appreciate them. Buy them flowers, chocolate, take them out for a nice meal or show them acts of kindness. Even just saying thank you when they cook you a meal or vacuum the floor. Just do a little something to show your partner that you appreciate them and everything they do for you no matter how big or small.
Know when to apologize
Nobody likes admitting they are wrong, and sorry for most people is a word they like to avoid. The key to a healthy relationship is knowing which battles to fight and which to lose and then to say sorry. An apology only has an impact when it is said with meaning, if you say sorry just to please your partner then it won’t work. Don’t say backhanded apologies such as “I’m sorry that you feel like that” or “I’m sorry that you don’t understand” because that's unlikely to resolve anything and possibly make the situation worse.
When you apologize, do it with meaning. Whether you hurt them intentionally or not you can say sorry from the heart regardless of your perspective on what you possibly did or didn’t do. If your partner is upset or hurt, there will be a reason for it. You can’t change someone’s feelings or thoughts, discuss the issue, resolve it and apologies.
A healthy relationship is built on equality and respect for each other. Keeping a healthy relationship can take time and effort. If you think things could be improved in your relationship, talk to your partner about it. Communication is an important factor when trying to solve issues. Some of the points mentioned above may be common sense but they are often neglected or looked over. Every relationship is different, everyone has different needs. Sit down with your partner and discuss how you want your relationship to be in a way that benefits both people. Most importantly, be happy! If you’re not happy or you are thinking negatively about your relationship, then it won't work. A positive attitude can change everything.